Trust me
by emicha
Summary: Time, love and devotion are the best and only remedy against a pain that is too huge and deep to endure alone.


"_He does not love me." _the girl confessed after Levi had asked what the hell was wrong with her. Five easy words that made him wish he had just ignored her sad, pale face like he had done for days. But now real tears ran down her cheeks, a few tiny ones at first but the amount grew with every breath. It was too late to back out.  
The sight of the crying kid in front of him made Levi feel uncomfortable. He looked around searching for somebody to help him out of this misery, but of course they were alone.  
He got himself together and cleared his throat before he awkwardly patted her shoulder.  
"Oh come on, Ackerman," he said as softly as he allowed himself to sound without feeling like a nursemaid. "Of course Jaeger loves you, he would die for his sister, wouldn't he?"

One second passed and to Levi's surprise, the ugly sobbing eventually died away abruptly.  
Mikasa lifted her head and the man hoped that everything was fine by now, if only for the sake of his own nerves.  
But he soon realised that it had been a naive wish.  
For a short moment the girl looked at him with her round, puffy face and before she could open her mouth to say something, she started crying once more.  
"That's the fucking problem," she sobbed. "Sister, always _sister_..."  
When Levi finally understood her point, he sighed and grabbed the crying mess of a girl by her chin, forced her to look at him.  
"Be grateful for this term, kid. _Sister. Brother. Family._ Those words embrace the kind of love that never dies. Everybody can have a lover but not everybody is blessed with a family. Do you understand?"  
Only then her tears stopped running. She silently stared at him before she nodded slowly.  
"But why does it hurt so much?"

Levi released the girl's face and shrugged. "Why would I know? All I can tell you is what you already know."

Mikasa breathed heavily and wiped away the last tears with her scarf. "And what would that be?"

"Pain fades away after some time. Trust me."

******"****_He won't come back?_****" ****the young woman whispered. Her words were nothing but dull syllables, spoken because somebody had to do so, somebody had to say it first. It were words that hurt in Levi's ears, primarily because they were true, secondarily because he could barely stand seeing her like this. Eren wouldn't come back. **

He shook his head. "No,he won't."

Silence.

"Maybe he managed..." Mikasa started desperately but the man next to her shook his head once more. "No, Mikasa. Don't."

The woman exhaled strangely long breaths that sounded as if she was in great physical pain.  
He was worried and yet he didn't know what to do. Nothing would be the right thing to say, nothing would be of any help.  
Levi could only watch when her shoulders started shaking just before she clenched her fist over her chest. With her thin, chalk-white face she almost looked like a dead. Levi knew she must be feeling exactly like one.  
"I feel nothing." she breathed, as if she could read his mind. The sight of her staring at him with big, disbelieving eyes felt like a kick into the guts.  
"It's my heart, isn't it? Does a broken heart feel like the void just opened up in my chest?"

The man swallowed, hard. He knew how Mikasa felt and it was something he had wished she would never have to experience. It was the darkest kind of pain. The numbness that saved you from feeling of the worst possible injury. There were no tears, no shaking voices, no screams. Nothing but silent despair.  
But she wasn't alone.

With gentle strength Levi took her tensed hand in his, squeezed it, tried to calm her damaged heart. His words were tenderly, understanding and Levi was willed to give her just a slight spark of hope.  
"Maybe you don't believe me now, but sometimes broken pieces can be reassembled. Trust me."

"_I love you more than anything."_ He heard his wife whispering softly to herself. She stood by the window, watching over the little boy who was running clumsily through the high grass in front of the house.  
His dark hair leapt up and down as he was giggling merrily because of the little butterfly he chased.  
Mikasa smiled. It was a nice morning, a better day, bearable times.

"He knows that you do." Levi assured her when he entered the kitchen looking at his family.

The man sat down at the table while Mikasa put a cup of tea infront of him, wishing a good moring before she also sat down. Levi eyed her, taking a sip of the yet steaming tea that always tasted best made by the mother of his child.  
As usual, her face was pale except for the dark circles beneath her eyes.  
"You were sleeping restlessly tonight."  
The smile in the woman's face faded slowly while she began to cleanch her fingers. "Really? I'm sorry."

As so often he took her hands in his and held it firmly.  
She shouldn't be sorry for something he himself knew to hide well. He'd never showed her how to do it, to suppress the pain, and he never would. He'd promised her heart to heal and the way he used to treat his own pain wasn't a proper remedy.  
But time was. Love. A family. Something that kept you from being consumed by emptiness day after day.

"Don't be, love. You're still recuperating."  
Mikasa looked at the table for a few seconds, then back to the window, back to her son.  
"I dreamed of losing him." Her eyes became somewhat dull, her hand sweaty. "I'm afraid of losing him. If I lost him I would die, Levi."  
Her husband leaned forward to kiss her temple. "You will never lose him, I won't let it happen. Trust me."


End file.
